As we hit December, the prospect of Christmas fills us with cheer! This may be for any number of reasons eg:
1. We can legitimately get drunk every day until January on the grounds that, “it’s Christmas!”
2. It gives us an excuse to eat three times our body weight in Celebrations mini Snickers bars.
3. We get to regress to the selfish mindset of our teenage selves, watching Home Alone on telly and knocking back Bacardi while our parents kill themselves in the kitchen, making Christmas dinner for 15 people.
These are all excellent reasons to celebrate Christmas, but for me, the highlight of the festive season has to be my Christmas Bingo party!
I’ve got a truckload of litre size bottles of Baileys (snap it up while it’s on offer!) and the girls are coming round to eat mince pies and get trollied to a soundtrack of Christmas songs.
If you want to recreate my Christmas Bingo Party at home, decorate your living room with far too much tinsel and tell your friends to bring:
- A bottle of something fizzy
- A Christmas stocking
- Two or three Secret Santa presents, wrapped in Christmas paper.
And of course there’s a dress code. The number one requirement is glossy red lipstick, to be combined with elf costumes, Mrs. Santa outfits, or Christmas jumpers.
Personally, I shall be channelling Mariah Carey in the video for All I Want for Christmas is You!
WHAT YOU’LL NEED
Prosecco – or Cava, because let’s be honest, nobody knows the difference. But do serve it in Champagne flutes!
Baileys: it’s always on special offer at this time of year, but supermarket own brands are also an option! Pour this into shots glasses before your guests arrive.
Half a kilo of sprouts. Cook these and put them on cocktail sticks before anyone comes round. You’ll need these for forfeits!
Pigs in blankets, aka sausages with bacon wrapped round them. Buy these ready to bung in the oven. The ones from Iceland are cheap and they’ve had good reviews.
Christmas party food: just buy a bumper selection of the frozen stuff and pop it in the oven.
A Santa hat. You’ll find them everywhere at this time of year.
Chocolate coins – you’ll need these as markers for Bingo!
- iPod tunes to include:
Mariah Carey’s All I want for Christmas is You!
The Pogues’ Fairytale of New York.
The Waitresses’ Christmas Wrapping.
George Michael’s Last Christmas.
Otherwise, if you’ve got the money, and you don’t want to write the numbers on bits of paper, you can buy an all-you-need bingo starter kit here. Or use one of our Bingo Games just as a number generator. If you are new to Wink Bingo you can also enjoy the Free Bingo versions.
HOW TO PLAY CHRISTMAS BINGO
It’s your party, so you have the first go at being the bingo caller aka The Voice of Christmas, which means you’ll be picking the numbers and calling them out.You also get to wear a Santa hat, wrap tinsel round your neck like a feather boa, and loop a couple of baubles over your ears like a Christmassy Pat Butcher.
Everyone else should have:
A scorecard - this is made up of 25 squares, ie five rows of five squares.
Markers, ie chocolate coins.
The Voice of Christmas randomly picks a number out of a Santa hat, or from the bingo spinner, and calls it out using one of the Christmas bingo calls (see below).
If The Voice of Christmas picks out number 1 for example, they shout, “Will the turkey ever be done? ONE!” The players then look to see if they have a 1 on their bingo card. If they do, they should put a chocolate coin on top of the number.
The aim is to cover five squares in row, whether it’s vertical, horizontal or diagonal.
Note: There’ll usually be a blank square in the middle of the card – you can put a chocolate coin on it without a number being called.
If you cover five squares in a row with chocolate coins, shout, “GET IN MY STOCKING!” To win, you need to shout it before anyone else does – and before The Voice of Christmas announces the next number.
The Voice of Christmas then passes round a bowl of sprouts and all the losers have to eat one. But The Voice of Christmas can hand out shots of Baileys instead – the power is in their hands to decide if you’ve been naughty or nice!
The person with the least number of chocolate coins on their bingo card has to do a forfeit. Options include:
a) Pretend slow-dancing to George Michael’s Last Christmas like you did at school, where it looks like a boy is touching your back, only there is no boy and they are your own hands. A video of this is going on Insta!!!!
b) Irish dancing for 30 seconds to The Pogues’ Fairytale of New York. Basically, springing up and down with your arms are locked to your sides, so probably wear a sports bra! Also going on Insta!!!
BESPOKE CHRISTMAS BINGO CALLS
These are your bespoke Christmas bingo calls – you can make up the rest yourself!
1) Will the turkey ever be done? ONE!
2) How much chocolate have the kids had? They’re going to spew! TWO!
3) Who’s got a Secret Santa present for me? THREE!
4) Uncle Ian’s such a bore! FOUR!
5) It’s the Queen’s speech - is she still alive? FIVE!
6) Mum’s cheating at Scrabble – it’s a fix! SIX!
7) Bucks Fizz at breakfast time is heaven! SEVEN!
8) Dinner’s nearly ready, don’t get back from the pub late! EIGHT!
9) Have an Alka-Seltzer, you’ll be fine! NINE!
10) Grandma’s at the sherry again! TEN!
11) Why are we spending Boxing Day in Devon? ELEVEN!
12) The elf is on the bathroom shelf! TWELVE!
13) My Secret Santa present was mean! THIRTEEN!
14) Out for Christmas drinks and I’m looking reem! FOURTEEN!
15) You eat the sprouts, I’m not keen! FIFTEEN!
16) Have we really got to listen to the Queen? SIXTEEN!
17) I’m skint after Christmas shopping – I haven’t a bean! SEVENTEEN!
18) The mince pie has gone - has Santa been? EIGHTEEN!
19) Move out of the way, I can’t see the screen! NINETEEN!
20) No more for me, seconds were plenty! TWENTY!
21) Yes we all look silly - put your paper hat on! TWENTY-ONE!
22) I’ve waited ages – who’s in the loo? TWENTY-TWO!
23) The Sound of Music is on TV! TWENTY-THREE!
24) I’ve eaten so much, I’ve worn out my jaw! TWENTY-FOUR!
25) I can hear reindeer – Santa’s arrived! TWENTY-FIVE!
26) Hide the Baileys, Grandad’s already pissed! TWENTY-SIX!
27) A big box of Quality Street – I’m in heaven! TWENTY-SEVEN!
28) Santa’s stuck in the chimney, he’s going to be late! TWENTY-EIGHT!
29) The turkey’s still frozen but it’ll be fine! TWENTY-NINE!
30) The mistletoe’s out and I’m feeling flirty! THIRTY!
31) Rudolph must have been hungry, all the carrots have gone! THIRTY-ONE!
32) I’ve just thrown up at my work Christmas do! THIRTY-TWO!
33) I’m so drunk, I can hardly see! THIRTY-THREE!
34) Santa can fill my stockings – fwoar! THIRTY-FOUR!
35) Christmas telly this year has taken a dive! THIRTY-FIVE!
Samantha Rea is a freelance journalist living in London. She can be found tweeting here